10 hours ago
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Meghna Pant, award-winning author, journalist and speaker
Tragic reports of suicide by men have emerged in recent months. These tragic events have raised frightening questions: Why are men dying in silence – why are they conditioned to be ‘like men’, and suppress their emotions?
How is it that the patriarchy system, which is considered beneficial for men, also causes deep harm to them? And finally, in a world where traditional structures like marriage seem to be succumbing to social pressures, do we now need to redefine such institutions?
More than 70% of suicide deaths in India are men. At the same time, society often presents men as protectors and givers. These expectations become shackles, in which they do not even get the space to cry for help.
A person struggling financially, failing in a relationship or struggling with mental health issues is told to ‘deal with it tough’. When he is unable to do so, he is considered weak and in a culture where masculinity is considered strength, this proves to be a disastrous decision.
In fact, these tragedies do not happen alone. They are symptoms of a larger social problem such as patriarchy. Patriarchy glorifies dominance and suppresses emotions and leaves men to fight alone in a silent war into which they are forced since childhood.
Feminism has long been seen as a women’s movement only. Whereas the truth is that feminism also liberates men. It breaks down toxic stereotypes that force men to live in predefined roles like provider or decision-maker. It gives them permission to be a caregiver, to ask for help.
Men who cry are still considered inferior to men in many households. A man who stays at home and plays the role of a parent is ridiculed. These narratives are the shackles that have been created in the patriarchal society. The fight to leave these expectations behind is not easy—it will require men to confront their own conditioning and take responsibility for holding accountable a system that is harming not only everyone but themselves.
In its present form, the institution called marriage is also steeped in patriarchy. It expects men to provide needs, women to nurture, and both parties to fulfill roles that may not be in line with their aspirations.
Marriage should not simply be a means of enforcing gender roles or social norms. This should be an option, not an expectation; Partnership, not sacrifice. In this, both the partners are free to move forward in their respective lives while building a life together.
Male suicides are not just a recent crisis – it requires action. Men must confront the patriarchal system that constrains them, support feminism and advocate emotional well-being. (These are the author’s own views)
